Against Satanic Power

Ok so here’s one more step closer to mystic faith…

It’s midnight-thirty, I’m in bed, desperately in need of sleep and I literally hear God say, “Billy, you need to go blog right now.”

I seriously think I’m under some spiritual oppression right now. I believe God takes pleasure in my blogging and so this is me combating the forces of evil.

Today I made some major headway on a project God has been bugging me to do for a long time. For the sake of ambiguity and alliteration we’ll call it “The Passion Project.”

The fact is I accomplished a lot today. And not just today, but several steps over the previous weeks have laid the ground work for for today’s progress.

So why do I keep hearing these voices of doubt?

“Wow you really blew off today and didn’t get enough done.”

“You are a fraud, Billy. You are a manipulator and you don’t deserve it.”

I’m not one to blame every bad thing on the Devil, but seriously, I believe there are evil spiritual forces that are upset at the current direction my life is taking. This is definitely an Eph 6:12 moment.

In high school I suffered this ridiculous amount of low self worth. Satan knows that’s still the chink in my armor and even though I live today as a confident man he can still get me to be a scared little boy with the right prompting.

I’m not taking it lying down. I’m fighting back and as Chris Tomlin reminds me my God’s big enough to kick his little red tail.

You know I really do have a lot to feel good about.

  • The family all had dinner together today
  • I got to tuck Eve-Marie in. (I work way too many night shifts and never get to do this)
  • I’m playing guitar in worship this weekend, something I haven’t done in almost 9 months.
  • God loves me regardless of what I do or don’t accomplish.

Well, sorry for all the weirdness.

5 Responses to “Against Satanic Power”

  1. 1 mtbriere July 20, 2007 at 7:32 am

    This was so completely not weird, or mystic. I’m impressed with how sensitive you are to God’s direction and aware you are to Satan’s lies. That guy knows exactly where to get each of us.

  2. 2 Chaotic Hammer July 20, 2007 at 1:21 pm

    Hope you don’t mind a random passerby stopping in and commenting…

    From a purely anecdotal perspective, my experience would be that your experience is the norm. It’s always during times when I really feel the Lord actively working, and really start to feel a strong sense of hope and passion, that out of nowhere attacks seem to come. I’m not and have never been a big fan of making a fuss over “the devil” and whether or not he and his minions are actually to blame, or whether it’s just something about our fleshly, sinful nature that inevitably flares up when real spiritual progress is being made.

    It has taken many years (I see that you’re a young guy — me, I’m an oldish guy) for me not to fall down every time this attack happens. Now I pretty much expect the attacks. I still don’t always win each battle along the way when attacked, but the tide of the overall war continues to clumsily lead closer to the real and ultimate goal of all my strivings — Jesus, the glorified King.

    So I guess my encouragement to you would be to keep pressing on. When you fall down, get back up and keep going. You’re no more worthy of grace when you’re walking in power and everything seems to be going great than you are when you’ve utterly failed and everything is going to hell in a handbasket. It’s just an optical illusion (spiritual nearsightedness) that makes it seem that there’s some kind of difference. His grace is always sufficient, in every situation.

  3. 3 Daniel Tomlinson July 20, 2007 at 2:11 pm

    I feel like sometimes you are reading my mind. I like that saying about the most personal is the most universal. That blog resonants in my own life. Thanks bro.

  4. 4 Fred McKinnon July 20, 2007 at 8:09 pm

    billy –
    want a wild “in the night/God said” story .. check out this old entry on my blog:

  5. 5 Billy Chia July 20, 2007 at 10:27 pm

    Thank you all for the kind encouragements. Especially from wise “oldish” guys.

    If your reading this comment, go read Fred’s post now it’s an awesome story.

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